Life Lessons

1. I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
2. I've learned no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses.
3. I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof to destroy it.
4. I've learned not to compared yourself to others, they are more screwed up than you think.
5. I've learned that it isn't what you wear, it is how you take it off.
6. I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you have finished.
7. I've learned to not sweat the petty things and not to pet the sweaty things.
8. I've learned the the ex's are like fungus, they keep coming back.
9. I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
10. I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
11. I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
12. I've learned that the people that you care about most in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away and the real pains in the ass are permanent.
    

My first best friend

After moving to Laingsburg, MI, I met my first best friend. He lived next door to me and we were the same age and went to the same school. We hung out at school and then after school. I was at that time 4 years old. We made up adventures and were always outside, not like kids today, who are inside playing video games by themselves and have no social skills. He had two doberman's who were trained to protect the house and the perimeter of the house. We were told never to go into their cages when they were locked up and to never let them in the house when his parent's weren't home from work. You think we listened, nope. We decided one day that it would be a good idea to go into the cages with these trained to kill Doberman's. Somehow we tricked these dogs to go to the other side of the cage and we got in the cage and jumped in the hole that they dug and put a piece of plywood over us. After the doberman's figured out we were in the cage and in the hole with the plywood over us, they proceeded to try to get to us. We were laughing the whole time and taunting them to get us. Those dogs dug like I have never seen dogs dig before, all the while growling and foaming at the mouth. His older sister heard this noise and came out to the cage to see what was going on and screamed at us to get out before they got to us. She actually had to go in and get steaks to get the dogs to the other side of the cage so we could get out fast. We both got out unharmed and didn't see why his older sister was upset, it was all fun and games to us. Another time, we decided to let these two doberman's in the house with us. We thought it would be fun to have these dogs chase us around the house. So we let them in and they began to chase us after we taunted them to chase us. We were laughing the whole time running from them, while they were growling and bearing their teeth and trying to bite at our feet. We knew a secret though, we knew that they were trained not to jump on the waterbed in his parent's bedroom, so when we needed a break, we ran into the bedroom and jumped on the waterbed and stood in the middle while the dogs were at the edge trying to bite us. Again, we were laughing and taunting them more. Again, his older sister heard this and came up and took the dogs back out to the cages, again we couldn't understand why she was upset, it was all fun and games to us. We then thought after the dogs were taken away from us to play with, that it would be fun to climb on top of his parent's dresser in the bedroom and jump off onto the waterbed. I can't imagine how close that bed was to bursting. Another time, we climbed a big walnut tree and I was dared to jump from the limb we were on to the rope swing that was about 5 feet or less away. I said sure, but I wanted his lucky rabbit's foot that he always carried around, it was blue. He agreed and I jumped, just barely making it, but made it. That broke the ground for him to start jumping from the limb since I made it.

The Tornado

This is the most traumatic experience in my life and I experienced this at the age of 3. I remember being in the house with my parents and hearing the wind and rain and lightning getting more violent. I remember watching tv with my parents and watching the news about where the tornado was at. I remember my mom and dad looking out the windows at the sky. I remember my mom telling my dad that we needed to get to the cellar now. I remember crying and saying that I didn't want to go outside to go into the cellar and my dad picking me up and taking me out in the rain, lightning and highspeed winds and opening the cellar door and going down in. I remember being in the cellar and remembering that we forgot our dog, Josh outside and screaming, "we forgot Josh, we need to get Josh" I remember my dad going to go outside to get Josh and my mom screaming not to go get Josh to my dad. I remember my dad saying he would be fine and he would be right back. I remember my dad coming back in the cellar with Josh. Then we all huddle in the corner waiting and I remember hearing a loud noise that kept getting louder and the house shaking and things breaking and the cellar doors rattling and wanting to open and when it seemed like the cellar doors were going to open, it stopped. I remember staying in the cellar until morning. I remember coming out of the cellar in the morning light and seeing nothing but destruction, like a bomb went off. I didn't recognize anything. I remember the corn field next to us flattened and all the fields around us flattened. I remember asking where my pool was and saying that we needed to go find it. I remember getting in the back of the truck while my dad drove around looking for my pool. I remember stopping at the neighbors that were outside and my dad talking to them and asking if everyone was ok. I remember moving what we had from Alma, MI to Laingsburg, MI to move into my Aunt's second home that she had.

The Beginning

Where it all began was in the small town of Alma, MI in 1972. The first memory I have after 1972 was when I was 3 years old. The memories I have from that age consist of my being chased in preschool by a boy around the playground wanting to kiss me, sitting in a fire truck that was brought to preschool for us to see, surviving a tornado, pedaling a metal car down the driveway that my grandparents bought for me, watching scary movies on tv on the weekends, opening an attic door and seeing something to this day I can't explain or put into words, and hearing my parents have sex.